Have you ever asked yourself this question?
And what answer do you give yourself?
Has anyone ever asked you this question about themselves? When a friend, a sibling, a child, a spouse—anyone we love–is unhappy, we long to help them see all they deserve in life. They may feel that because they are not perfect, or have made some bad choices, or have hurt other people, that they no longer deserve happiness. Perhaps they feel bad about themselves. Guilty. Unworthy. Unlovable. Incompetent. Beyond hope.
But we see them as they really are, and we know that simply because they breathe, they deserve to be happy. And on top of that, we see past their imperfections and their bad decisions and we see their good and wonderful qualities. And while we know they might need to make some changes, we would give anything to help them see themselves through our eyes, and we want them to be happy NOW, with their flaws and all.
So, do YOU deserve to be happy?
I have a feeling that you—like so many people–give a different answer for yourself than you do for others. You forgot one basic truth:
Simply because you breathe, you deserve to be happy.
You hold yourself to an impossible standard. You put the needs of others before your own. You’re still beating yourself up over a bad investment, a bad relationship, a bad habit. You will give yourself permission to be happy when all the loose ends of your life are tied into neat and pretty little bows. Right?
I’d like to offer you a different perspective. I’d like to tell you that what’s true for those you love is true for you, too. The answer you give them is the answer you must give yourself: YES.
And when is your happiness allowed to start? Today. Now. This minute. Even if you’re holding a cigarette, or have a stack of overdue bills, or you’re reading this in the office when you know you should be working.
Don’t demand perfection of yourself before you allow happiness for yourself. Focus on creating joyful moments rather than on criticizing your flaws. Those who love you would tell you the same thing. You deserve to be happy just as you are, warts and all.